Friday, September 16, 2016

My Girl

Bursting loudly into the room as I am filling out her gifted paperwork:
"OH MY GOD, MOM! I HAVE SAND IN MY BUTT CRACK! AND MY BUTT HOLE! HAHAHA IN MY HOLE!!!"

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Callum on Hobbies

"Art, and feeding myself food. Yeah."

Friday, September 09, 2016

Callum on Mexican Food and Aging

(In the men's restroom, as told to me by Jason.)

Callum was in the single stall, taking his sweet time pooping, and loudly signing, mariachi-style, "Delici-o-so! Delici-o-so!"

Then turning strangers into friends at the sink:
"Are you an old man?"
"Yes I am."
"I am not. I am five. First I was three, second I was four, and third I am five!"

Wednesday, September 07, 2016

Teenager

Early morning call from 8th grade:

"Mom, you need to come get me. I have an ear infection. I need medicine."
This is unexpected news since we were actually at the doctor's office last night at 5:30 pm for a physical, and knowing he'd had a little hint of a cold (which hit me and the baby hard, listen to me croak) the doc had made a big ordeal out of telling me his ears and lungs were a-okay.
"What are you feeling?" (And what drugs do you think I have to give, son?)
"Oh, you know, it's an ear infection, and it's in that ear where I ALWAYS have ear infections."
(No, I don't know that ear. You had one ear infection in the 13.5 years I have been your mother, which was back in kindergarten, so...) "I need you to describe it to me. What exactly does it feel like?" (Not gonna say pain, or pressure. You gotta come up with those on your own, kid.)
"Oh. it's definitely an ear infection. That's what it feels like."
"Did the nurse look in your ears?"
"No, but she did take my temperature and I don't have a fever. Weird, right?"
(NO. What class are you missing?)

Nurse gets on phone:

"He does not have a fever, but he tells me he is wearing glasses from third grade and I think that might be the problem. With your permission I'm going to send him back to class."
"Yes, please."

He did get glasses until 4th grade, but you know, whatever.

Also, dad found your glasses in less than 60 seconds, in the exact place I told you they'd be. You know, where you looked for 55 minutes before giving up.

Tuesday, September 06, 2016

Violet Lost, And Found

Shopping in the pantry with her cart and baby.


Monday, September 05, 2016

Violet on Taking Care of Momma

Dear Babes,*

Thank you so much for taking half-chewed food out of your mouth and shoving into mine, over and over again, with the happiest of smiles. It actually brings tears to my eyes, because you are so big and omg I love you to the moon and back, too. You and I are going to have so much fun together.

Love,
Momma

*Callum's name for Violet