Keeping It Real

If gardening bores you, well, this isn't completely about gardening, or the environment...eventually.


One of the most rewarding parts of home ownership for me so far has been having a yard. And in that yard I have been working on our very own 300sq ft veggie garden. Since our soil is 100% alkaline crap, it's been a slow process. Oh, and I am trying to not only get in as much rich organic matter in as possible for the least amount of money, I want to raise the whole 300sq ft bed a minimum of 18 inches.

Yeah. It's gonna take a few years, but I'm enjoying the ride. I'm a sweat equity kind of girl.

So we got into composting, and last year vermicomposting. When ever I think about it and I'm already in town I stop at every Starbucks along my route and pick up used coffee grounds, which with my totally alkaline soil is a rock star when it comes to amending the pH. Starbucks will literally give you gigantic garbage bags full if you request them. (Info here.) And dude, it's free. Awesome.

The whole family is pretty well trained, and just between composting, recycling and bringing our own bags to the store right now we could easily go 2 months before filling our city issued trash can to the top. Heck...even in our hick town they offer electronics recycling at no charge a few times a year. It just keeps getting harder and harder to simply throw things away.

So do I think my little family making a difference? Hell no! But it's the thought that counts.

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Now, for the record, I don't plan on making lasagne, or spaghetti, or pizza. (Recipes here.) I also hear it's excellent sautéed up with a little onion and...what was it? Fennel, perhaps?

But dude, I totally want to bring home the placenta.

And I am oh so totally serious.

Fuck no I don't plan on eating it, but hello, it really seems wrong to just send it off as biohazardous waste, probably to some incinerator when I could, I dunno, find some way to use it to spruce up my veggie garden.

Totally organic homegrown zucchini...anyone? Anyone?

And once you find people you actually know have already BTDT the stigma fades quite quickly. Turns out a good friend of mine from our preschool co-op kept hers in the freezer for 2 years before she figured out what to do with it. Let me tell you...it was one of the top 5 hot topics of our drunken, off-site Halloween party. There's nothing like stories of freaking out the people who dare to explore your icebox sin permiso to get a party started.

(That and her husband dressed up as the most convincing Mormon missionary ever, complete with backpack and bike helmet. We like them and we're feel honored that they like us back.)

Honestly, I am not quite as hippie as I sound. There is still a part of me that keeps asking...really?

But my mind is made up.


Okay, so where to start? G-o-o-g-l-e.

Alrighty. Apparently I will need:

-a placenta
-1 large Tupperware container with a "very tight fitting lid"

Oh for Christ's sake.

But beware! DANG-EH! Step 5 of How to Take the Placenta Home warns:

"Keep it away from any pets you have. Do not allow your pet to smell it so it can get your baby's scent. Most pets have an instinctual desire to eat the placenta."


Good morning, friends. =)