Callum on Style

I call this look "Star Wars Threw Up on Me."



Many mornings I still have to talk him into being warm and covering the shirt. "But if you cover your Star Wars tee with a Star Wars hoodie you will have EVEN MORE STAR WARS! Dude, think about it. Count it out!"



Buying guide:
Hoodie via Costco Wholesale, kicks by Vans, t-shirts by Old Navy/Gap/Target/mother-in-law, backpack by Pottery Barn Kids, SW-free sweet baby Jesus miracle pants that survived big brother by Gap

Photo credit:
He was nearly frozen for a whole minute because his bro gave him a mostly dead cricket.

Olive on a Very Big Number

In retrospect I was likely wrong, I was so tired, but I thought I heard Olive repeatedly say Google+ when she meant googolplex. What I do know is that as I began to define Google+ I was immediately interrupted with a "Go look it up, Mom."

That's new.

Olive on Tween G

"Are hormones assholes? Because G is being one."

Touché. And timeout for language.

Chistoso

Completed and signed in English on the reverse, I gave it back to my child to turn in at least a week ago.

Hip Hop Hooray

Naughty By Nature was on right before going into Target. As we made our way through a very long list, Callum serenaded the adults with, "HEY, HO! HEY, HO! HEY, HO! HEY, HO!"

He is so mine.

So You Want to Be a Snowman?

I had started making a Vader costume because we were many months deep into I won't leave the house without Darth on my body.

But no, he had his heart very much set on something else.



I do love a man in tights.

Callum's Evolution of Music

It started with "What Does the Fox Say?" He wore his Ewok fox costume every day for like six months straight until it got too hot and I had to pull rank. Then we took it to chilly California this summer and wore the shit out of it some more.



Next came Katy Perry's "Roar" on a loop from late 2013 through early September 2014. Yes, that was waaaaay too much Katy Perry, even for Olive. It was cold out when Darth Vader and The Imperial March became a parallel obsession, which began the "If I can't wear my fox costume then I must wear Star Wars clothing six days a week" phase. For some unknown reason, there's also some serious Pavolv's Dogs shit going on: any time Callum hears the word "hat" he still busts out singing The Imperial March. NO CLUE.

Now it's "All About That Base."

Question

In the spirit of Halloween and the Tootsie Pop question, how many car lengths can my children get before I notice they are all outfitted with big ass sticks?

The silver minivan is ours, so...two?

Death with Dignity

She has my mom's cancer, and my unwavering support.

I See Four Year Olds

Second year of band, October 2014


Second year of preschool, October 2007


I have a smilier one, but the sax player/ninja's face is blocked by nose picking.

Olive's First Grade Teacher on Visiting the Restroom

"Gentlemen, please remember to keep your hands to yourself. LADIES! Remember: flush-wash-leave! Flush! Wash! LEAVE! No chatting, no hanging out. Do not make me have to send in a search party."

Callum on Cleaning Up

Momma singing: "Clean up, clean up, everybody everywhere..."
Callum singing: "No no, no no, no no no no no no no..."

A favorite oldie I keep forgetting to write down, luckily there was yet another encore presentation this weekend.

What is it?

Is it a cow?




Is it a dog?




It is a dog.




Good morning, butthole!



(Glad to see all the 50+ ladies on the school staff taking balloon butthole pictures and giggling, too.)

Olive on Grades

Absolutely devastated. "Two out of three? WHAT!? Mom, I just got my first F!"

Olive on the Bonus Letter Rule. Or not.

Last week in first grade Olive was introduced to the the Bonus Letter Rule. This reopened a whole new can of insecurity over spelling. Yay! Ya know, because she doesn't know all the rules of English yet, and she's about to turn six and a half.

Writing and illustrating a book with bunnies for funsies while her brother does his homework:

"Mom, I think fur has one r and fur-ry has two. Is that correct?"
"Yes."
"Spell it."
Seriously?
"Please?"
"F-u..."
Little giggles from Olive.
"...r-r-y."
"Can you start over?"
"F-u..."
Hysterical laughter around the table.

Good one.